[00:00:00] Nathan Maingard: Wow, this whole life thing can be really challenging at times, and I know you know what I'm talking about right now. Welcome back to We Are Already Free, the podcast inspiring and empowering down to earth seekers like yourself, to live more honest and authentic and connected lives. So many of us walking around not showing our true selves because we're scared of what others will think.

[00:00:23] We've learned lessons as children that we've carried into our adult lives that are limiting us. And now we've become the critical parents inside our own minds recreating day after day the same old patterns that we were given by society, by school, by teachers, by bullies, by parents, whatever it is. And this is really this invitation for those of you and those of us who are stepping up into life in a different way.

[00:00:47] This is a solo episode. So if you are new here, I highly recommend going and listening to episode one with Tara from slow down farmstead or. Gosh, my food [00:01:00] lies or Fia or gosh, there are just so many just, just, uh, I recommend one of the beautiful guest episodes. This one is really more a personal sort of stream of consciousness journal that I'm sharing with those of you who listen more deeply.

[00:01:15] And who know me better through these conversations that I have with all these wonderful humans from around the world. And thank you so much for being a part of this It's really a pleasure to be here with you as you may have noticed The episodes are not coming out with as much consistency as they were and that is going to change.

[00:01:32] I have Excellent news for you. I have taken a huge leap of faith and have invested in a long term podcast coaching program that runs for anything up to, well, for a year really, and also has personal one to one coaching and group coaching and a course to go through. So it's been a huge financial I would say the part of me wants to say the word risk and the rest of me knows that it's [00:02:00] in fact an investment and an incredibly courageous one because it's gonna mean that this podcast can really show up in the world in the way that I believe that it has the potential to.

[00:02:11] Because there are so many of us in the world right now who are navigating these changing times where we've realized that the systems that we were born into have not supported our flourishing, they have not supported our liberation, our freedom, if you will, our sovereignty. And so what do we do in that?

[00:02:28] And then acknowledging the bigger picture, which is that we are Having this finite moment floating in infinity, having an experience, and actually there's something far greater at work here than just the simple physical manifestation of all this. Like where do we, where do we focus most of our energy and attention?

[00:02:47] Is it on that external? Like going out there and making physical change in the world. Is that the priority or is it the internal? And if you listen to my previous episode with scott of [00:03:00] sky cave retreats I think that was one of the most impactful for me where he runs darkness retreats, so just a brief summary If you didn't listen to that one, where people will go for anything from 24 hours up to four or five or even more days in complete darkness pitch black with no stimulus from the outside.

[00:03:18] They get fed a meal once a day. He comes and checks on them once a day. But other than that, they're in a room in a cave away in the dark for all that time. And one of the very interesting things I heard him say was that those who have spiritual practices like breath work and meditation, and they're often the ones who struggle most to really let go.

[00:03:38] into the beingness of that space. And what that tells me is that even these practices that I myself have become so reliant on, the ice bath, the breath work, this, that, they themselves become attachments of an identity, the identity that says, I must meditate to be closer to enlightenment. I must meditate to move forward on this path.

[00:03:59] [00:04:00] When in actual fact, often it's the people who have no idea what they're getting into, no practices to fall back on. They dissolve immediately into presence. And he said sometimes they'll sit for hours and hours and hours just in pure presence. And I, and there's something there, there's something in this commercialized consumerist culture that we currently find ourselves in, that inspires us or invites us or indoctrinates us to always be looking for the next thing, when in reality, there is no next thing.

[00:04:31] There's nowhere to go. Think about it this way if you're in infinity, why does it matter where you are? If we reach enlightenment, so what? Then what? So you're enlightened. For how long? For a million years? A billion years? Ten kazillion trajillion trajillion years? Fantastic. Then what? At some point, part of the cycle is to be enlightened, to know all, to be all, to be present with all, to fully come into the moment of absolute knowingness.[00:05:00]

[00:05:00] And then to return, to forget. I often think that the gift of God, the gift of infinity, which I call God, you can call however you feel. But the fact is we're in an infinite universe. Anyone who tells you different, I would love to hear how they work that out. Um, but I lost my train of thought thinking about infinity, which kind of makes sense.

[00:05:20] Oh, the gift of God. That's it. I remember I just remind myself the gift of God is forgetfulness. is that we are given the gift to forget that we are infinite. Because infinity is also, I think, a synonym for infinite, a synonym for infinity could be insanity.

[00:05:37] Because what we call sanity is the idea, the forgetfulness, and the idea that I, Nathan, am separate and you listening right now is separate with your worries and your concerns and your joys and your loves and your partner and should I keep this job? Should I do a new one? Should I move to the country?

[00:05:51] Should I stay in the city? Should I move to the city and leave? All the questions, all the stories. That is what we call sanity and what we [00:06:00] call insanity is often those that we put into the sort of mental asylums. There's a beautiful story of elder Malidoma, an African shaman who was trained, many generations of shamans who came before him and he was trained and then when he had been initiated into his full sham shamanic trainings, he was sent to America to study in America and he got two different degrees and all these things.

[00:06:22] Anyway, blessings to him. He passed quite recently, but he went to visit a friend of his who'd been put into a psychiatric ward in America. And when he walked in there, he looked around and he said, Oh, this is where they put all their healers. I mean, take a moment for that. That in a, in a culture that's integrated into the reality of infinity, people who display these symptoms that we might call schizophrenia or Multiple personality disorder or whatever the different things names are psychotic this and that in their tribe That is a calling to medicine because those people are so called insane Which means in a way they're more connected to the fullness of infinity [00:07:00] Of course, they'd hear multiple voices.

[00:07:01] Of course, they'd have multiple personalities of course, they'd be seeing spirits and all these kinds of different things because As they continued out from this little identity of the self, they start to access all these different realms. And then they need the initiation to be the people in their tribe, the people in their community who can hold that for the community, who can hold that together.

[00:07:22] So what is this all about? What am I talking about? What I'm saying is that we can change the world out there as much as we like, or at least we can push for that. But the reality is that so few of us, almost. No one, very, very few people is focusing only on what they themselves can control. What can you control right now?

[00:07:44] What is your actual sphere of influence? It's your thoughts. It's your actions. It's what you choose to say. And then maybe there's a little bit around you. Maybe it's tiny right now. Maybe it's like you have one pot plant. [00:08:00] Well then... Take care of that pot plant. I'm thinking of this right now because I just let a plant that I really love Or that I said that I loved it's basically died and I and i'm realizing I'm not taking care of some of the things that are directly within my sphere of influence and i'm getting very overwhelmed and very upset and very emotional about all the things happening out there in the world.

[00:08:19] Oh, I've got to get on Instagram and, you know, argue with someone in the comments when my plants are there crying for me. And so this is the invitation is to start at the deepest level of inside. Who am I? Am I enough? Can I be enough no matter what? And I'm speaking to you from having just gone into a neck spasm a few days, a week ago, and I've been sick, coughing.

[00:08:40] And for me, that always comes with this. deep sense of failure, like I'm failing as a, as a man, as a human, I shouldn't get sick if I'm healthy, all these different stories, which I think are all serving me to, to come into my own enoughness, no matter how I'm doing or what I'm doing, I am in infinity.

[00:08:56] There's nowhere to get to. I will become infinite. I will [00:09:00] become enlightened. And then I'll return to the worm, to the seed, to the worm, to the cocoon, to the butterfly. Always cycling in and out forever. So this is not going to be a very long episode I'm going to end this quite soon, but I want to say that what I'm realizing in myself is that I want to Keep committing and going deeper into the things that I can control.

[00:09:21] And one of those is making this podcast as epic as it deserves to be, because I think there are so many of us who are remembering that we are already free. And yet the society is telling us totally different. You are not free. You are not powerful. You are sick. You are unwell. You are ignorant. You should listen to the experts.

[00:09:40] You know, you know, nothing. Don't trust yourself. Don't trust your eyes. Don't trust your heart. Don't trust your body. Don't trust the people around you. Um, so this is the invitation is to step into a different way of being internally. I saw a beautiful image during the lockdowns. And if I remember, then I'll put it into the show notes for you.

[00:09:57] This video of this wonderful woman, I [00:10:00] forget her name, but she shared a video where she had a pile, a pyramid of sugar cubes. And it was during all the lockdowns and all the stuff was pretty intense. And she said, you know, I was wondering how this is all going to unfold. What's going to happen? Uh, what does this all mean?

[00:10:12] And then she said, I realized it's, it's not about knocking the, the, the sugar cube at the top of the pyramid off, you know, that the, those out there and up there, but actually, and she started pouring water into the bowl that the sugar cubes were sitting in. And as she was pouring the water, the whole pyramid started to dissolve from the bottom.

[00:10:28] You know, like all the sugar just started melting into the water and she said this is actually what's happening Is that we are slowly dissolving and dissolving all back into one and that the whole pyramid will collapse of its own accord As we continue this journey of dissolving. So This is what I wish for you.

[00:10:46] This is what I wish for this podcast. This is what i'm here for So I am taking a bit of time I have and To my guests who I have recorded already six or seven episodes waiting to go out that I need to edit Thank you for your patience. Thank you dear [00:11:00] listener Thank you for for whatever you're going through right now, wherever you are, whatever's unfolding in your life I know how big it is for you.

[00:11:08] How real it is Whatever you're navigating whether it's wealth or scarcity whether it's love or loss

[00:11:19] I know how overwhelming it is at times confusing even. So I just wish you well on the path, and please know that I'm here. Please reach out. I do post semi regularly on, mainly on Instagram. I do wrestle with those platforms, but there are those moments of connection when I see someone has been deeply moved by my strange and vulnerable sharings, my weirdness.

[00:11:44] And if you haven't heard me say this, I will say it a lot more, but the word weird, the origins of the word weird, simply means one who controls their own fate. So I have decided that I am proudly weird. And most of my coaching clients actually, it's one of the things I hear a lot of people say [00:12:00] is, I just think I'm weird, you know, people say I'm weird to some, and then I'm like, you're my people, you're my people.

[00:12:07] So my wonderfully weird listener and with whomever you are listening, whether it's with your partner or by yourself or while doing the dishes, thank you so much for being on this journey with me. Uh, let me know, does this resonate with you? You know, go to the, always alreadyfree. me. It's a simple, just the word already, the word free.

[00:12:23] me, and send me a message. Let me know. You know, I've got a little chat blocks there or block, chat blocks. I was going to say block and box and it got mixed. So a little, send me a message. How does this, would you like more of these kind of stream of consciousness, verbal journals, if you will. Verbals.

[00:12:43] That's great. Verbaling. And, um. Yeah, that's it really. It's been a pleasure. My furry wisdom. I posted a video recently on my Instagram of me Well, you didn't see the rest of me But the top half of me I was naked in the sunrise and I think kind of struggling with the things I mentioned around the the deeper [00:13:00] feeling of being a failure because I've been sick and I haven't been showing up fully and I've been on my tech too much and I've been doing all the things that I'm not supposed to do.

[00:13:08] Nathan, you're not supposed to do those things and then Of course there's a heavy weight that comes with that as I judge the parts of myself that I don't think are showing up appropriately. All those stories. Anyway, so I did a post on Instagram, just a spur of the moment video. And in it, I said, PS follow me for more furry wisdom because I'm super hairy in case that's you're like, why is he saying that I'm a very hairy man, which has been an incredible journey and I would love to go into that, but perhaps for another episode.

[00:13:34] So let me know, would you like to hear my journey of being a hairy man in a smooth man world? And Honestly, when have you seen a hairy man in a photo or on a movie or anywhere out there in the media in the world? It's been quite a thing to navigate, as we all navigate these parts of ourself. But maybe it serves for you to hear the story.

[00:13:51] So, I will leave it there. I, I'm just, I'm just imagining you somewhere beautiful or somewhere. Ugly or somewhere mundane or [00:14:00] somewhere special on a road trip or in your kitchen or hanging up washing or Lying in your bed wondering if it all means anything and I just am so happy that you're here I mean, this is a gift that I get to share this with you in this moment and here we are here it is This is now.

[00:14:18] You're enough. I'm enough. Well done us. Please send me a message. I really want to hear from you and I wish you blessings. I will be back with more episodes soon. As I said, I'm doing this course. The podcast is going to be reaching new heights of, of stability, consistency, power, it's going to reach so many more wonderful people, and it's going to be a part of this massive transformation that we are all going through.

[00:14:41] As I know it is for you who is listening right now, because you know it, you feel it, you're with it. So yes, thank you. Blessings on every little aspect that you are, every tiniest piece to the most massive parts, all of it, may you be blessed in every single way. I will be back soon and thank you for [00:15:00] joining me as we remember that we are already free.